THE POWER OF FORGIVENESS

THE POWER OF FORGIVENESS


Indeed, part of forgiveness is knowing that we are capable of handling the same situation if it arises again. People who forgive are people who know they will be able to handle the situation appropriately if it arises again.

"Turning the other cheek" only works as a technique of sorts. If it enlightens the person who is transgressing a trust, then it's a valid technique and, indeed, the most effective one . . . for it allows for self-correction.

If, however, the other person continues doing the same thing, it obviously isn't working. And continuing to turn the other cheek, as your mother did, will eventually breed the opposite of forgiveness - as it did with your mother.

But, when kind-hearted people like your mom later can't forgive, who it is they can't forgive is what's interesting.

It no longer is the other person, but rather - for having permitted the transgressions to continue - it sadly becomes themselves.

And thus self-forgiveness is what truly becomes the first and most necessary spiritual act.

You've indeed learned many lessons. And thank you for all your kind words about the books.

God bless,

Michael Norwood

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My mother used to say that when you love someone, it is easy to forgive them. I was always amazed at the way she did that with my father. She adored him for most of her life. But I knew since I was in the sixth grade, that my father didn't love my mother, that his relationship to her was one of duty, obligation and much disrespect. He had at least two affairs, one that was longstanding till the time of his death. At the end of my mother's life, she refused to be buried with him. I think your heart can be broken once too many times that there's nothing left to give anymore.



It's taken me 7 years since my father's death to forgive him. And the process continues as there are still memories of him that still pain me. Forgiveness for deeper hurts, I've found, is a matter of the will as well as spiritual intercession. I've also discovered that it's a concerted effort to see the positive characteristics and virtues of that individual as well as seeing the hurts not as personal attacks but as derivations of that person's limitations and weaknesses. I am also learning that forgiveness entails taking a look at myself to see what I have done to bring hurt or to exacerbate any pain in his life.

With regards to spiritual intercession, I found that surrendering all my burdens and praying fervently for guidance and assistance were powerful means of healing and direction. I had difficulty trusting God and men for many, many years because of the image of men I received from my father. In 1991, I saw a movie on Medjugorje, where the Virgin Mary had been appearing to several children on a daily basis since the mid 1980s. I knew then that I had to go there. Then strangely, I had begun to have several dreams of the Virgin Mary as if she were drawing me near to her. I was finally able to get to Medjugorje in 1996, the year before my parents died. We were saying the Rosary prayer on Apparition Hill where she appeared to the children and during the course of the prayer, I had a vision of her in the sky. She then turned into a cross on fire and the cross then turned into the sun. I then heard a voice say, "You shall receive graces when you return home." I left Medjugorje elated, thinking that everything would be hunky-dory when I returned. The following year and the months, years thereafter were the most difficult times in my life. In retrospect, I understood that the Blessed Mother meant that She would grant me graces through the trials and tribulations, not that they would be eliminated from my life. I believe I had this spiritual encounter because I did not have much support of other family members and friends during this period, for various reasons, that I was the only one in the family led to Christ and that She felt mercy and compassion towards me in light of my circumstances. As I had mentioned earlier, my father, my mother and my sister were all ill at the same time and I had a nephew that I was helping to raise.

Forgivness is unresisting,we require it as oxygen to our sole please take a lung full and exhale away any resistance you have to the man.In fact lets all have a cannister each and forgive ourselfs for we are innocent.And to me that = FREEDOM. love and peace and a golden new year to everyone.

One of the hardest lessons for me to learn about forgiveness was that the act of forgiving someone was not for their benefit, but for my own. When you look at it from a "selfish" standpoint, it becomes easier to do. For when you truly forgive others, you are freeing your heart from resentments that are taking up precious space in your soul, where love of self and of others could be residing.

So, when you forgive, remember it is not for them, but it is for you.